Killer Single Dad

Something I’ve learned from watching Lifetime movies is that 1) if the opening scene is an attack, we don’t actually care about this person (They’re unfortunately the sacrificial lamb for the drama ahead), and 2) things move FAST, so don’t get too comfortable and get ready to take in a lot of information quickly. I’ve also learned that Lifetime is all about three-word titles and wordplay, and “Killer Single Dad” is right on the money – I personally love that Lifetime is pushing this as a fun phrase with dual meaning – that in 2018, people are walking around saying, “Wow, Luke is a killer single dad,” as a way to compliment a cool unmarried father, not just a murderous parent! Frankly, I’m inspired to say it more, and add more bitchin’ unwed guardians into my friend circle, but I digress.

Let’s jump in. We got a model home, we got a baby being tucked in by a mom, and we’ve got someone breaking in within two minutes of the movie starting (told you things move fast!). Like I said, this is the opening attack so don’t get too caught up – this is just to set the tone for the movie – the drama appetizer, if you will. The man breaks in and goes to kidnap the young baby immediately. He accidentally wakes up the mom, but she’s unable to catch him, so we’re in, we’re out, one baby kidnapped. He’s got a baby seat and “wheels on the bus” tunes all ready, so in terms of Lifetime kidnapping scenarios, this is one of the better ones. He refers to himself as daddy to the baby…so we’ll see where that goes.

Garret being lame
Garrett – he’s got a classic handsome face that can quickly look crazed, the Lifetime special.

We cut to another huge house in daylight and we see the same man at home washing dishes and looking out at the yard watching his kids play – but wait a minute – they just vanished – it was just an illusion in his head! So this man is a kidnapper and also crazy – lots of info for 4 minutes in. We also learn that his name is Garrett when he opens the door to an old woman, Olivia who is over to apply to be his new nanny. Olivia is CLASSIC nanny vibes – old and British as hell. We learn that Garrett is a widow, with his wife and two children dying in a car accident recently (which explains him having visions of kids. But uhhhhh, where’s the vision of the late wife? I’d be pissed if I died like her and was left out of the nice visions.) We also see that Garrett has an office and won’t let the Nanny in – so definitely there’s suspicious in there.

Olivia – the ultimate nanny. She’s British, she’s old, and she knows how to eavesdrop like the best of them.

Turns out he needs this Nanny to watch the first baby he kidnapped because he’s off to kidnap another baby – he tells Olivia he has more kids that are away with family, and he’s going to be picking them up soon. So YEAH, these are his kids – maybe sperm donor? Given up in adoption? We shall see.

He arrives late at night to the next house he is going to break into and sees the couple fighting. Turns out Matt (the husband here) kissed another woman at a party “on accident” and Jen (the wife) is super upset, kicking him out. When Matt leaves, Garrett breaks into the house and goes straight to the nursery – only to find out that the baby hasn’t been born yet! Jen is still super pregnant, so Garrett can’t kidnap that baby quite yet (so yeah, we can assume he’s a sperm donor here…) While Garrett is on his way out, Jen is coming down the stairs and falls over and starts bleeding. Garrett secretly calls 911 to have an ambulance come and help Jen, since after all, that is HIS baby he needs to protect.

Luckily, Jen gets brought to the hospital and is all good – turns out she was too stressed (probably from her husband cheating on her) and she’ll be okay. Garrett secretly stalks Jen all the way to the hospital, sitting in the hallway to hear about Jen’s condition. Apparently, hospitals don’t care about privacy because Garrett learns that Jen and the baby are going to be fine just by sitting outside her hospital room since the doctor doesn’t care to close the door.

Jen on phone
Jen – she’s bland and pregnant and very trusting of Garrett.

Jen may be stressed, but she’s not stupid – how did she get brought to the hospital? Who called 911? She could have sworn she left the door locked but the EMTs were able to get in because it was unlocked! Jen decides to ask her dad, who is a former firefighter, to reach out to his contacts to find out who called 911. AKA Jen is an AWARE, SMART AND STRONG LADY so now we know the main character we are rooting for!

Jen’s dad helps her track down Garrett at home and she asks him how he helped her – he has some whole story about how he’s moving across the street from her and wanted to check out the neighborhood, heard a fight, and then saw her on the ground when he looked in. Jen is totally convinced and now they’re basically best friends and get lunch. The nanny, who is there and eavesdropping, is confused, because HELLO she just started working here and has heard NOTHING about moving. When Olivia starts asking Garrett questions about moving, he tells her to mind her business or he’ll call immigration (I guess that’s why it was important to make her British? To have some kind of threat?)

Olivia is NOT having it and breaks into Garrett’s office, where she finds details on the fertility clinic he donated to, life insurance money, and a map with pins showing where all the women he stalks lives. We can put together that these are women who were impregnanted with his sperm from the fertility clinic – not sure where he got this information, but then again, it seems hospitals in Lifetime movies aren’t quite concerned with patient privacy. The worst part is she broke a paperclip in the door’s lock  in her attempt to lock the door again, which Garrett sees and fires her on the spot – which to be fair is probably the right move since she did invade his privacy. But we’ve learned a lot of things.

Now that Olivia is gone, Garrett decides to actually move across the street from Jen like he said previously so that he can keep an eye on the pregnancy and steal the baby when the time comes. My bigger question is what is Garrett’s job that he has all this money to buy a house and hire a nanny, but never goes to work and has enough free time to kidnap babies? Not that I want to do what he’s doing, but I like to admire a work-life balance when I see one.

Matt is irrelevant
Literally the only photo I could find of Matt is a blurry one of an actual TV screen with captions on it because that’s how irrelevant Matt is.

He tells Jen about the move, who is super excited. For a Lifetime Leading Lady™, she’s not very suspicious, which is really unusual since they’re the ones always frustrated that no one is listening to them! Matt comes by at the same time and is pissed to see Garrett there – and is double pissed since Garrett made a report saying that Matt attacked Jen! But everyone hates Matt right now so no one listens to him (OMG – is Matt a Lifetime Leading Lady™??)

Garrett helps Jens set up the nursery, and naturally, sets up a camera in there so that he can monitor the space. He’s even so bold as to ask Jen to watch baby Laura (aka the first baby he kidnapped) while he goes to “pick up his other kid from his family.” But the second kidnapping doesn’t go quite as smoothly as the first – he makes noise and is caught by the mom who sees his face, so Garrett has to do some damage control AKA KILL HER.  So for those keeping count, we’ve got two kidnapped babies and one dead mom.

Matt, still mad that Garrett is spending more time with Jen than he is, does some off-brand Googling (seriously, they call it Giggosearch) to find out more about Garrett and can’t find anything, which leads him to suspect that Garrett is lying about everything. I mean, Matt is right in his hunch here, but I think he needs better evidence than “nothing came up when I giggosearched him” especially since if I google “giggosearch” nothing comes up but I KNOW it was used in a Lifetime Movie!

I think even Jen’s realizing how weird it is that she agreed to have Garrett come to Lamaze class with her…

Matt tries to tell Jen that Garrett is a liar when they run into each other at Lamaze class (yes, Garrett goes with Jen to Lamaze class, which looks just as weird as you would imagine) but Garrett explains that he asked the reporters to keep the tragedy of his family out of the papers, and Jen believes Garrett again. Garrett even goes in on Matt saying he doesn’t have social media because he doesn’t need the attention from women like MATT DOES. BUUURNNNNN! So yeah, Garrett sucks, but Matt sucks too, you guys! He cheated on Jen!

Garrett tells Jen that he wants to make amends with Matt to make things easier for everyone, and invites Matt over for a beer and to clear the air. But we know Garrett is crazy and has another plan: he says that Jen told him about the clinic and belittles Matt for not being able to give her a baby. Garrett then pours a beer on HIMSELF and smashes his own head into a mirror, making it look like Matt attacked him. Matt tries to explain the situation to Jen, but the scene is too convincing to Jen, so Matt is taken to jail.

We see Garrett looking up home remedies to induce labor, so I guess he’s growing impatient and needs that baby ASAP. He doesn’t waste any time and begins feeding Jen that raspberry tea to make her have that baby already. He’s getting antsy, but so is Olivia, the nanny, who brings herself back into this movie. She comes by his new house saying that she knows about the fertility clinic, the kidnappings, that his real name is David Miller and that he used his late wife’s life insurance to buy the house (there we go, I knew there was money somewhere!) She wants $25,000 to keep quiet, which Garrett is not about to do. Instead, he decides to kill her and bury her, which solves that problem. So that’s two kidnapped babies, and now two dead ladies.

Back to Jen. Matt gives her a call saying that Garrett got a restraining order on him that keeps him away from even seeing Jen or being near his own house. He tries once more to convince Jen that Garrett is up to something but she doesn’t believe him. Matt asks Jen why she had to tell Garett about his infertility and that they used a clinic – Garrett threw it in his face – and Jen says she never told him! Then how did he know?? Matt tells Jen to think about all the things suspicious about Garrett – that he knew about the clinic, him calling 911, that he knew the nursery wasn’t ready, etc. Jen FINALLY realizes that uh yeah, this is all super weird stuff, and she needs to go do some snooping on her own.

Jen sends Garrett on an errand, giving herself time to break into his home office. There have been MULTIPLE picked locks in this movie (I think literally four) which convinces me that it’s very easy to open locks with household items and makes me doubt that locks actually even work at all.

Garrett is obviously crazy so he has cameras in his own office that alert him when there’s movement, so he knows that Jen has broken in. She finds news footage about the kidnapped babies and a robbery at the fertility clinic she used and she puts it together – Garret is a sperm donor that is collecting all the babies that have his DNA to replace the family he lost in the car accident.

Jen scared

Jen races out back to her house and calls Matt to tell him he was right about Garrett and to come over as soon as possible. But she’s not ahead of Garrett, who is waiting for Jen at her house, attacks her and takes her to his old house. Of course, we need things as dramatic as possible – so Jen starts to go into labor! Garrett ties her up while she’s giving birth. The baby is born in what is basically five minutes, Garrett takes the baby leaving Jen tied up and intending for her to bleed out and die.

Matt knows Garrett’s old home address from when Jen’s dad originally tracked Garrett down as the 911 caller, so Matt heads there to attack Garrett. He’s not really any help though because Garrett knocks him out pretty quickly. The only good thing is that while Matt distracts Garrett, Jen is able to untie herself and get to her baby! Garrett comes back in just as Jen is holding the baby, and he goes to grab the baby from Jen. But this is LIFETIME and Jen is a Lifetime Leading Lady™ so she has a knife in her hand that she easily stabs into Garrett’s heart! In his last moments alive, he imagines his dead kids, as if he’s joining them, but don’t feel bad for him or think this is sweet because remember that he’s a kidnapper and murderer!

So the kidnapped babies are returned to their parents, Jen and Matt get back together and raise their baby, and Garrett is super dead. All’s well that ends well!

This was one of the more villain-focused Lifetime Movies that I’ve seen rather than focusing on the main woman. In fact, Jen is not suspicious about Garrett for about 85% of the movie which is rather unusual! We do still get some classic Lifetime features, though: model homes, questionable finances, dead families, off-brand items. I’m happy with it, but I definitely prefer the movies where the women know what’s up first and spend most of their time trying to make people listen to them. I give it 5/10.

One thought on “Killer Single Dad

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s